Moving closer to the face of God

The other day I was trying to tell Abbagail something and she was having a hard time focusing on me. We try to get out children to look us in the eye when we talk to them so they can learn to be attentive and also so we know that they have heard what we said. Abbagail was so distracted as I was talking to her and she was getting kind of frustrated that I kept asking her to look at me. In her frustration she brought her face very close to mine while I was talking to her. All of a sudden she had no problem paying attention to me and what I was saying. She maintained her eye contact and got the message.

I couldn't help but think of my own relationship with God while I was talking to Abbagail. The closer I seek the face of God, the more able I am to focus on Him and what he is telling me. As we move closer, the distractions become less. It takes so much more thought though and takes being very intentional about what we do. I, along with most people, have so many distractions around me. There are so many things I am pondering right now and we are trying to get through a situation that has left us with a huge sense of betrayal and frustration. I have never felt this type of feeling to this degree. It has given me such an opportunity to focus on myself and the hurt that I feel, but my daughter reminded me that this will continue to have my attention unless I move closer to the face of God. What are my distractions? What do I think is necessary, and what really is a distraction wearing the costume of necessity? Who are the people around me that are seeking the face of God, and who is just playing the game? Who are the people around me that need to see me seeking the face of God instead of trying to figure out what just happened? If I expect Abbagail to focus on Jason and I without distraction, then I must be willing to set the example. She needs to see my heart fixed on what matters and not what has the ability to steal my joy on a daily basis.

I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.  John 16:33

The best for our children...have you studied?

I have come to realize that there is an enormous difference between wanting the best for our children and understanding what the best for our children really is. As my husband and I seem to be parting ways with modern culture in search of what God's best is for our family, we find ourselves walking down paths that just aren't popular with the crowd, yes even the "Christian" crowd. We find comfort in this, however, because Jesus too walked a path of a "square peg" existing in a "round" world. The longer I am alive, the more I have become uncomfortable in this world. Many of Satan's lies have been blown wide open for us. I use to feel the need to become defensive and to be understood, but that has transitioned into a feeling of peace as I have come to understand that God's ways will never be what everyone else is doing.

This leads me to the thought that we have not even began to understand what it means to "train a child in the way that he should go". We would love to claim victory through the second part of the verse, "and when he is old he will not depart from it", but we seldom want to truly seek the face of God when it comes to understanding what God means by training a child. I take this verse quite literal and believe that a parent that completely surrenders his AND her ways over to the leading of the Holy Spirit will experience the wisdom in this truth. We are seeking everyday, and know that we have so far to go. We don't want to take anything for granted and want nothing to slip through untested against the scriptures. God is moving in BIG ways and we are finding that we have to count on His ways, not the popular way. There are very few parents that I know that wouldn't say that they love their kids, and probably would give their own lives for their children. How many parents though, are willing to give everything over to the control of God in order to save their children? Would you give up your child's athletic success if the spirit so moved you? Would you sacrifice your child's academic achievements? Would you quit your job to spend more hours at home with your children? What would you be willing to do? Anything, to save your child?

Loving our children and wanting the best for them begins with complete surrender! Allow your children to feel uncomfortable in this world, you will do them a huge favor! Allow your child, however, to know the unconditional love of  a family life that reinforces what God expects of each of His children. Who you and your family are at home, is who you really are! Does everything your child understands about God come from someone else teaching them in a class you drop them off at? Is God contained in a church because that's the only time your child hears His name? Do sports, work and entertainment come before family worship time? Like I said, what your family does at home is what your family is really about. The disciplines of family life do not come easy, but only when we are seeking God intentionally will we ever know the joy of all He has to offer.

Will the mother in me please stand up...

Conviction has overcome me lately in so many areas. It has been nice, although uncomfortable at times, to experience a fresh wind. I am thankful that God loves me enough to change my circumstances in order to teach me more about Him and myself!  One area that particularly has stuck with me and I am motivated to improve is my role as a mother to my sweet little Abbagail. Karson and Raleigh are no less important, but my ability to train and equip our little girl is just different. I have something that no other person in the world can give her, and that is the love and example of a mother as we share the same gender. She needs me now more than ever as her little heart is being shaped by everything around her! I have had so many distractions lately, and it has been so convenient to let time pass by with the hopes that soon things will be different- more organized, less to do, less unknowns, more time, more energy, and the list goes on. I have found myself so easily aggravated, and I have had to confess this sin to my family and to God! 

Sunday we attended church with our house church and it was such a wonderful time of worship. The children within the participating families are included in the worship and teaching time, and it is such a wonderful addition to our time together. We were worshiping together, and I got the privilege of watching one of the purest forms of worship I have ever seen. Abbagail danced before her God without worry of those around her and what they might be thinking. I’m sure as the mother of this sweet child, it meant more to me than any other there, but it was precious. She gracefully swayed to the music with hands held high and I was at that very moment drawn to her and given a glimpse of how I bless God when I am pure.

As mothers we have so much to instill in our daughters, but it has to begin with ourselves! Do I smile when I’m working? Do I treat her daddy with the respect that she needs to know and be able to show her husband someday? Am I giving her the time to learn about what I’m doing, or am I just trying to get the task done the easy way? Am I doing what it takes to keep her heart??? I’m not willing to allow her heart to be misled in such a formative stage of her heart, or any other stage for that matter. Her ability to fulfill her calling as a child of God depends on it!

Lord, lead me to what is noble, pure and right! My daughter is watching and I want what I have to give her to be what she finds to be right in the end!